Rainy Sunday.

Well, I am sure you all can tell, I am back to the world of blogging. I guess I have been a little blog happy. I don't know what it is but after 7 cloudy rainy days in a row I just needed a little outside of my life experience and posting can give that. Today, I went to church and saw the Romanian Gypsies Migue has been trying to help. It touched my heart so much. The kids came up to me and gave me such big hugs and asked why I hadn't been back. I just felt so loved. We all need to pray they find them an apartment soon because the government is threatening to take the kids away. It is just crazy to me. Please keep them in your prayers.

I have been listening to a sermon about the cases against Christ. The great thing about being here in Spain is I have missed this whole message about the tomb of Christ being found. I was shocked to hear there is all this stuff surrounding the Resurrection of Christ. It made me sad, but listening to the sermon really helped me to see that there will always be people who dont want to believe in Him, but the craziest thing is their theories require more faith to believe. We try to complicate things so much!

I understand this. I am already going through a little struggle because right now, I am struggling with questions of the future. You see, I am always the girl with the plan. I know my next three or four steps before I even venture out. However, God is only telling me one step of the way. As a result, I am struggling. I want to know what He has next for me because I like knowing, so that I have something to look to the future. Also, I just want him to tell me that the next transitions wont be as hard as my transition was to Spain. The last few days, I haven't slept well. I keep having dreams about certain things of the future and how they go completely wrong. It's silly I know, but when it seems to be re-occurring you tend to think you are doing something wrong.

All this goes back to complicating things. My dad always tells me to keep things simple. If I truly lived like that I would be blessed to realize all the things God has worked out for me to go back to the states. Although, I think I need to reapply for a position at the UofA, I know everything will be fine. I have a house, a roommate, a car, a prospective job, and a direction (to GRADUATE). However, I am not satisfied. I want to know the little details like; will I struggle a lot when I go back? Will I feel lonely alot? Will I miss Spain and the people here so much it is unbearable? Will I have moments like I did last year but at home? Will my family and I get along? Will I feel completely socially awkward? Will I keep speaking Spanish or will I lose it?

Lots of things to consider; however, not things to give me nightmares.